Wednesday, May 4, 2011

MiLB LIFE: The Clubhouse Barber

Every team has one. The resident barber - the player who owns a pair of hair clippers and serves as stylist for the majority of the team. He's a staple in any clubhouse - but the talent level, well, that isn't so reliable. After witnessing far too many comically bad haircuts, I've learned there's a fine line between owning a pair of clippers, and actually knowing how to use them.

I've usually kept my distance from the clubhouse barber chair. Sure, a free haircut's a sweet deal - (although it's expected you give your teammate a little something, ya know, for the effort) - but my hair is on the longer side and I cringed just picturing what the end result may look like after a couple of razor swipes to the skull.

Most of these guys specialize in the few types of haircuts one can achieve with merely a pair of clippers - the fade, the mohawk, or the many different levels of the shaved head, or "wiffle" as I called it as a kid.

But this season, I hit the jackpot. Lacking means of transportation to go get a proper haircut, I spoke to our clubhouse barber about my options. "I could just give you a regular haircut. Trim you up with scissors, if you want." Wait, what?