SMALLS TALK: The Curtain Call

Just when you think a crowd can't get any more hopped up, it happens. The hero that just brought the stadium to its feet pokes his head out of the dugout, jumps up on the top step, and offers a tip of the cap to the home town fans. And just like that, the steady stadium cheers erupt into an even louder collective roar.


It's a perfect baseball moment. In a game of countless traditions, the curtain call has all the ingredients needed to leave everyone in attendance feeling good about themselves, their team, and most importantly, the state of our national pastime. It's a beautiful thing, really. 


A huge play - usually, but not always, a home run - just took place: a giant momentum swing that changed the entire landscape of the game. The fans are going nuts, and they're not stopping until their appreciation gets acknowledged. So they cheer. And they cheer. And they cheer some more. And just when you think the noise is finally about to die down, here comes our man.


For a player, it's the biggest thrill imaginable. After getting bombarded with dugout high-fives, hugs, and atta boy's, the hero of the moment places his batting helmet back in the rack and slowly takes off his batting gloves, taking in the moment and yucking it up with teammates as the crowd shakes the stadium walls around him. The fans want another peek at their star - but they'll have to wait. At least for a moment.


As a player, you can never assume the curtain call. The call is a privilege - the crowd determines your fate. So while the crowd waits, the player does the same. He's making small talk, exchanging one-liners, detailing his big play for inquiring teammates - but really, he's gauging the crowd. How loud are they? How long have they been cheering? Do they seem stubborn in their volume level or are they fading?

DUGOUT LINGO: "Cage-Killer"

Sometimes, you just can't get out of the cage. We've all been there - you hit ball after ball after ball up into the netting above you. You try to comfort yourself - How far up is this thing today? - as though the cage's location on the field was robbing you of no-doubt homers. You do your best to play it cool, but with each pop-up, a little panic sets in and finding your way out of the turtle seems more and more impossible. 


You can't get on top of the ball for the life of you - you're calling for the Driver but somehow the Sand Wedge keeps finding its way into your hands. It's a horrible feeling, and you know it's bad when comfort comes in the form of a dribbling ground ball. I got out! But hey, it happens.


Everyone's been guilty of testing the strength of the cage's netting at some point. There's a little cage-killer in all of us, and even the greats aren't immune - just ask Brickma. 

DUGOUT LINGO Series

"Stay Hot"

"By You"

"Ugly-Finder"

"Pick Him Up"

"Poo-Slinger"

SMALLS TALK: Coolest park to hit a home run?

There is no feeling in the world like hitting a home run. I enjoy goals, I've celebrated touchdowns, I love tracking a birdie putt, and I even get a rise out of a drained three-pointer, but nothing has ever compared to the sensation of sending one over the fence. The pure pop of the bat, the trajectory of the backspinning ball, the half-hearted pursuit by the outfielder, the roar of the crowd - it's a magical moment, and it could happen on any pitch.

A home run has the ability to lift confidence levels to amazing new heights. During your at-bat, you achieved the best possible outcome in the history of baseball - a result Ty Cobb could not top and Babe Ruth could only hope to match - so enjoy it. The victory lap around the bases, the cheers, the high-fives - in this moment, all eyes are on the home run hero - you are the show.

Home runs are always special, but there are some ballparks that present certain circumstances that make leaving the yard even cooler.

Historic Fences: Watching the left-fielder look directly up into the sky as your ball sails over Fenway Park's 37-foot Green Monster is an accomplishment that links you to some of the game's biggest names who have maneuvered their way past the monster's celebrated grasp over the past century. An equally famous wall can be found on the North side of Chicago. The only brick wall still in MLB circulation, outfielders have nothing but a layer of Wrigley Field's legendary ivy to cushion the blow of a head-on collision. Hitting a big fly at either of these ballparks will have you feeling at one with baseball's timeless tradition. 

Favorite Landing Spots: A splash is always fun. Whether it's Tropicana Field's rays tank or Chase Field's outfield jacuzzi, the chances of directly hitting these targets are remarkably low which makes these fan-friendly occurrences even more entertaining. Yankee Stadium's Monument Park is another great landing zone, connecting Yankee greats, past and present, through the magic of the long ball - after all, there's no greater way to pay tribute to a legend than by peppering his statue with homers.

TOP 5: Questions Heading into the 2012 Season

Time to take baseball's biggest questions to my Crystal Ball.

There was no shortage of exciting moves this MLB off-season - rosters were filled with big names, organizations underwent major makeovers, and countless storylines were set for the 2012 season. Each team represents a series of plots that will unfold over the course of the next eight months - here are my TOP 5 questions heading into the season.

Can Prince Fielder and Miguel Cabrera co-exist in the field?

Serious question: the Tigers know they're in the American League, correct? I understand that neither of these sluggers wants the unappealing title of "Designated Hitter," but I have a hard time believing there aren't going to be some costly errors made at the corners of the Tiger infield this season. This isn't Gold Glove Kevin Youkilis moving to third to make way for Gold Glove Adrian Gonzalez - you may be able to hide one of these large bodies at first base, but both in the same infield may be trouble.

Everyone's happy with the arrangement now, but what happens when they hit that first defensive skid and the media starts pointing fingers? May get mighty awkward around that post-game spread.

Who will win the AL West?

The Texas Rangers have been the best team in the American League for the past two years, and honestly they may have gotten even better this off-season - so how is it possible that they may not even win their division? Well the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, California baseball team - did I get that right? - were also busy this winter, adding two of baseball's biggest signings to their veteran-laden roster.

Pujols was obviously a huge sign - he will likely go down as one of the best to ever play the game (please be clean...) - but I'm more interested in the addition of C.J. Wilson as a number 3 (!) starter, cementing the Angels' rotation as the strongest in baseball, in my opinion. C.J.'s history in Arlington and the mystery that is Yu Darvish only adds to the drama within this rivalry, which could present an exciting race all the way through September. Oakland and Seattle are both a few years away from competing, but even they have to be excited about all the great baseball games they get to DVR this season.

Will Bryce Harper make his Big League debut this season?

Like him or hate him - if he plays, we'll watch. Nicknamed the "Chosen One" by Sports Illustrated and labeled The Lebron of Baseball, it's easy to forget that Bryce Harper is only 19 years old. Although it may appear he has a lot of growing up to do, none of us passing judgment have had to handle a spotlight with even a fraction of the glow as the one Harper has been under since his sophomore year of high school. He must keep his cool while seemingly the entire baseball community wishes him to fail - while, of course, playing a game of failure.

While sometimes it certainly seems that Bryce may only be looking out for Bryce, can we really blame him? I can't speak to his behavior as a teammate, but to his credit he appears to be great with fans and has managed to produce strong numbers on the field amidst the media storm that has been his career. And don't look for that attention to go away anytime soon - if the number one pick from the 2010 Draft makes it to the Bigs this year, the entire baseball world will be watching.

SMALLS TALK: Would you want Manny on your team?

1 + 1 = the number of times I've been busted for PED's!

I loved Manny. His playful personality, his smooth right-handed stroke, his consistent production - I, along with countless others, considered him one of the best hitters to ever play the game - and there was a bonus: in addition to home runs and RBI's, this guy pumped out sound bytes that had TV producers drooling. I mean, what was more hilarious than the Manny being Manny series? He was the zany clubhouse clown in addition to being one of the league's most feared hitters. Whether or not you liked him, you couldn't deny that he was entertaining to watch, both on and off the field.

But then, something happened. At some point between his unceremonious departure from Boston, his first 50-game suspension, his mediocrity in Chicago, and his sudden abandonment of Tampa Bay, Manny became a villain. His immature ways that had always passed as wacky were now scorned as irresponsible and idiotic. His cluelessness that had once made him so lovable had become a blatant disrespect of the game. He had always been quirky, but it was no longer a happy-go-lucky quirky - he had gone bad.

Manny's numbers are now tainted by two failed drug tests. His reputation is in shambles, and his career, over. Until now. Now he wants back in, and up until two days ago, no teams were biting.

There are some guys you simply stay away from. They could have all the talent in the world, but they don't possess the qualities needed to help a team more than they hurt it. Look at Barry Bonds - has he even retired yet? He had been tentative to use the "R" word after playing his last game in 2007, adamant that he was still a free agent "waiting for a call." Well the problem was: no one was calling. The phone wasn't ringing for Jose Canseco either, who's been eager to get back to the Big Leagues since he last played in 2001. Some guys just aren't worth the risk.

Sadly, I now put Manny in that category. Aside from the two steroid-related suspensions, I'm most turned off by the way he completely abandoned ship in Tampa Bay. After receiving news of a second failed drug test, he fled the city without notifying anyone in the organization of his sudden retirement. Teammates that were counting on him to produce, a manager looking to him for leadership, and an organization that took a chance on him - all left in the rear view, left to deal with a Manny media storm before they even knew what had happened.

So if I were a GM today, I wouldn't touch Manny with a ten-foot stick. Recently he has proven to be more trouble than he is worth. Can he still hit? You bet he can. But not like he used to. And given his unreliability and erratic behavior, I'm not willing to take that risk just for a few fleeting Vintage Manny home runs.

But maybe Oakland hit it just right. A minor league deal, paying just over the league minimum? Seems like a small price to pay for a player that was once widely considered a first ballot Hall of Famer. But then there's the 50-game suspension. And the media distractions. And the everyday uncertainty of just what he'll bring to the table. What appears to be a deal that could only have upside still looks too risky to me. I can deal with mistakes. I'm all for second chances. But sadly, I believe Manny Ramirez has overstayed his welcome in Major League Baseball.

Though he did produce some memorable moments.



SMALLS TALK Series
College Baseball's Opening Day
On-Field Composure
When did "Can I have your autograph" turn into "Give me a ball"?
Baseball Needs a 24/7 Show
Top 10 Things to Do in the Dugout During a Day Off
The Spit Hit
Being Friends with Pitchers
The Yankee Core
Opening Day
You Play Right Field?
It's Not Always Sunny in Arizona
Tee Work
Helmet for Pitchers?
Approaching Spring Training
Top 5 Things I Won't Miss About My Local Gym
Getting New Equipment
Last Day at Work
My Bat of Choice
The Superstitions and Quirks of a Ballplayer
The Art of the Autograph
Greensboro's 'Bat Dogs'
Tim Kurkjian is a Man Among Boys
Baseball Movie All-Star Game: Starting Lineups
Walk-Out Music
Pre-Draft Medical Questionnaires
The Ryan Howard Namesake
The Magic of the Rally
Jeter and A-Rod, How Times Have Changed
Summer Leagues - Cape Still Cream of the Crop?
SportsCenter Commercials are Better Than Most Shows
Schilling's Bloody Sock
Red Sox Nation Goes Crazy, JD Drew Can't Be Bothered
Minor League Hats are the Way to Go
Who Has the Best Uniforms in College Baseball?

MOVIE RANT: A League of their Own

I don't care who you are, A League of their Own is a classic. That's a fact. You can dispute it all you want - go ahead, claim it's a "girl movie"; tell me it's too lovey dovey; argue that Madonna playing baseball discredits the entire thing - I'm not budging. Without a doubt, A League of their Own is one of the best baseball movies out there, and sits securely among my personal favorites.

First off, any movie that features Jon Lovitz in perfectly small doses is off to a great start. Then there's Geena Davis, who managed to pull off this dirty, slugging, tom-boy elegance that the male race never before even knew existed (nor that they liked it so much). Madonna and Rosie O'Donnell aren't exactly my two favorite people on the planet, but they both nailed their supporting roles, producing a Pinky-and-the-Brain type of dynamic that backboned the humor in most of the scenes. And whoever bit the bullet and played Marla Hooch, thank you for countless laughs.

There was also this guy named Tom Hanks. No one could have brought the miserable yet hilarious Jimmy Dugan to life like this Academy Award winner. One of the best characters in any baseball movie, he produced too many great lines to list them all. There is one that has managed to stand out, however.



I'm pretty confident I know more lines from A League of their Own than I've memorized from Die Hard, Scarface, The Godfather, Shawshank, and Braveheart combined - and I've got no problem admitting that. An innovative (and true) storyline, a captivating set of characters, comedy at every turn, and a baseball backdrop - it's my kind of movie.

But there is one thing that has always bothered me. Now whether Dottie dropped the ball on purpose in the final play, we may never know - we tend to think she did mainly because she owned Kit in every aspect of life and could make that play with her eyes closed, but we will never be certain. That is not my concern, however.

What rubs me the wrong way is that to this day, February 21, 2012, Kit still hasn't touched home plate. She comes racing in like a wrecking ball, slams into Dottie, and goes flying through the air, never once coming into contact with the plate, thus, never scoring the championship-winning run. Could you imagine how frustrated Dottie would be if the ump made the right call? "God Kit, I put it on a platter for you and you still manage to mess it up!" Still can't believe Jimmy Dugan didn't argue that one.

MOVIE RANTS

Rookie of the Year
For Love of the Game
Summer Catch
Field of Dreams
Bull Durham (by Chet Steadman)